Jul 27, 2014

Solivagant

The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love. It may look paradoxical to you, but it’s not. It is an existential truth: only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of another person—without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other. They allow the other absolute freedom, because they know that if the other leaves, they will be as happy as they are now. Their happiness cannot be taken by the other, because it is not given by the other.” - Osho

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” - Mark Twain


"Traveling is a brutality. It forces you to trust strangers and to lose sight of all that familiar comfort of home and friends. You are constantly off balance. Nothing is yours except the essential things—air, sleep, dreams, the sea, the sky—all things tending towards the eternal or what we imagine of it." - Cesare Pavese


"Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors." -Terry Pratchett

"I miss so many places but I really don’t miss any places at all. Because missing a place is really a substitute for missing a group of people, a mindset, a time - an era of your life defined by your surroundings because they were different than anything else you’ve ever known. Going back to the place won’t satiate the longing or quell the nostalgia, because no matter what, things have changed, and people have moved on and the place won’t be how you’ve left it. Sometimes returning to the city or the country just adds to the emptiness of knowing that you can never return to those specific trips that shaped you; you’ll never recreate those memories fading ever-distant into your past. you can’t tug at the ever-flowing current of time to get just a few seconds back of that feeling of truly living that was inspired by the confluence of stars that brought you, those people, that place, those circumstances together all at once. 

So the only thing to do is keep chasing, chasing that wanderlust, collecting more and more experiences that you’ll then miss equally sharply, leaving a trail of goodbyes and adding to the ever-growing list of places you miss, experiences you ache to replay, moments that define who you are. those places are home, even if they will never exist again the way they did for you then." - I wrote a note on my phone at midnight, by Marit B.




Where to start? I backpacked through Western Europe...by myself! During the beginning of my trip my stomach was in knots, I was nervous. I contemplated what would happen if I cancelled my plans. Initially, I didn't want to go alone...but I had no one to go with me. I've dreamt of travelling for years, and I was finally making my dreams come true! 

I was alone, but not lonely. I was surprised to meet many female solo travellers like myself. I met a lot of travellers who allowed me to welcome their company. And when I would wander the streets alone, I was engulfed by the city. I was amazed by the history, the people, the buildings, the animals, the plants, the people. I had a few conversations with other solo travellers, it's always interesting to hear another perspective. 
  • In Barcelona, I met a boy named Pablo from Colombia who was staying in the the same dorm as me and we both agreed that solo travel was preferable to traveling with companions; unless you and your companions were "long time" friends and could agree on plans. 
  • In Madrid, I met a Frenchman from Paris (I can't remember if we exchanged names or not) whom I had a conversation with while standing in the middle of a busy, loud bar. He was a good foot taller than me, and he had to bend down a lot to hear what I was saying. He didn't seem to agree with me. He said he preferred to travel with a companion/friend because he liked having someone to share experiences and moments with (~french men...haha just kidding). I countered that I did have people to share experiences with, I met so many amazing people during my travels. But I understood what he meant, I suppose I agreed with him, to an extent. 
  • Also in Madrid, I met a girl named Michelle from New Zealand who said she had been traveling with a friend during the beginning of her trip, but was travelling solo towards the end. She said when she was travelling with her friend she was less open to meeting people because she already had a friend, but when she was alone she was more open. She said she was happy to be meeting more people.
I was told on separate occasions that I was "brave", which is an adjective I would have never used to describe myself. I wanted to travel, so I did it. I'm a dreamer with a bad case of wanderlust. I enjoyed traveling solo because I was free to do what I wanted, when I wanted. I was forced out of my comfort zone on multiple occasions (I'm a different kind of adrenaline junkie, according to my friends haha), I had to figure out public transportation on my own (which is very difficult when you don't speak or read the language), and I would return back to my hostel feeling a sense of accomplishment every day I had gone out on my own. I have to agree with what the Frenchman said about having a friend to share experiences with. Traveling with a companion is a completely different experience. But honestly, if I had to travel to Europe solo again, I would do it in a heartbeat. But I would not be so quick to deny the company of a friend.

I traveled to:
Lauterbrunnen, Switzerland (the Swiss Alps) 



Nice, France (heart of the French Riviera) along with Eze Village and Monaco

Avignon, France (an ancient, Medieval town in Provence) 

Nîmes, France (a short trip away from Avignon, but filled with much more ancient Roman architecture and influence)

Barcelona, Spain (part of Catalonia, rich in a unique culture and language) 

Madrid, Spain (the capital and the heart of Spain) 

Pamplona, Spain (for the San Fermín Festival) 

San Sebastián, Spain (part of Basque Country, with a unique language and people with a set of unique genes)

Le Château de Versailles (a palace so extravagant, you couldn't help but understand why the French Revolution began)


Paris, France (a city who's charm I could not resist)

What did I take away from visiting all these incredible places over a period of 5 weeks?

I gained a new appreciation for the small things in life. I learned to appreciate my body for being able to carry 20+ pound backpack and for being able to walk miles in each city - for being stronger than I give it credit for. An appreciation for school, because I met a girl from America who wanted to go to school, but the fees were too high. An appreciation for nature & science - I constantly amazed at the nature that surrounded me and the fact that some sort of physics, or biology, or chemistry had occurred/or was occurring that made it possible. And an appreciation for America - no, the USA is not the best country, but it is home. It's a fairly young country, you won't find hundreds, or thousands of years of history walking through the streets, but I learned to appreciate the diversity of America, which is unparalleled in any of the other cities I visited (although immigrants are everywhere). In the words of Carlo Goldoni, "A wise traveler never despises his own country." 

Long ago, I told myself I wanted to travel for one reason. To experience humanity. Although I didn't realize it at the time, I was experiencing humanity firsthand everyday I was traveling. Thinking back, I'm amazed at how quickly connections could be made between strangers; whereas, in America, smiling at a stranger is such a huge effort. In France, I could barely speak the language, but I was still able to "communicate". In Spain, I made an effort to use my high school Spanish to try and embrace the culture around me. I walked around cities, with no particular destination, embracing the history and culture that surrounded me. I learned to live on a lot less. I took risks. I connected with strangers. I learned about the world. I experienced humanity. 

I wish I had been able to carry my DSLR around with me, but it was too much of commitment. I was more worried about having my things pick pocketed to worry about protecting my DSLR, so a majority of my photos are from my iPhone. Although I'm not in a lot of the photos I took, as I scrolled through the photos I had taken, I was able to remember the feelings and the moments that led to that photo. The best kind of souvenir


"This is why once you’ve traveled for the first time all you want to do is leave again. They call it the travel bug, but really it’s the effort to return to a place where you are surrounded by people who speak the same language as you. Not English or Spanish or Mandarin or Portuguese, but that language where others know what it’s like to leave, change, grow, experience, learn, then go home again and feel more lost in your hometown then you did in the most foreign place you visited.
This is the hardest part about traveling, and it’s the very reason why we all run away again. " -Kellie Donnelly
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